Clones Behaving Badly (kinda long but hopefully amusing)
From: Roosa Lehto
Newsgroups: alt.music.monkees
Subject: Clones Behaving Badly (kinda long but hopefully amusing)
Phew, it's been tough ! It's taken me some time to get used to
living with my two personal clones of Micky and Mike. I understand
now that ordering Mike naked was probably not the wisest desicion as
he got a little cold wearing only his "optional" towel. (not that
I minded at all...)So, I suppose I'll have to order a full
wardrobe for him as the poor man can't stay in bed under the covers
for the rest of his life. (Repeat: not that I mind at all...)
For now he'll have to make do with Micky's clothes, though I must say
he doesn't look too pleased about having to wear "the tablecloth"
but Micky finds it very amusing and his happiness means a lot too.
However, I think my clones have been damaged on delivery or there
were some tiny mistakes made at the factory as things aren't
runnig as smoothly as I expected them to. There's the jealousy
thing. ("You like Mike more than me ?" - "Isn't one Texan Monkee
enough for you ?" - "Why do you keep mentioning Peter ?") It's
almost scary how human and lifelike they've made these guys.(The
Japanese and Jenny will invent anything !)
The real problem is with the sleeping arrangements. Suffice to say,
I can't have both of them in bed with me (Just for cuddles ! I'm
keeping this story nice and clean !) as tempting as it may sound.
I tried it but in the morning I was sleeping next to my bed on the
floor and Mike and Mikcy were holding eachother tightly in the bed.
(At first I thought this might be manufacturing mistake number
one...I always though it was kinda strange they shared beds when
they slept over at different places in the TV series...hmmm...)
The only solution to a good night's sleep was to work up a rota
for each night of the week. So now, Micky gets Mondays, Wednesdays and
Fridays, Mike gets Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. On Sundays we
rest and I think about getting a Peter clone.
But this plan doesn't seem to work either. They just can't handle
staying in the closet on their nights off and it's let-me-out this and
I-can't-breathe that...I mean, how's a girl suppose to concentrate
on the hunk in tha bed with that going on in the background !?
So last night I made a daring desicion and sent Mike to sleep
at my friends house. It should've been ok. She has never liked
The Monkees and is more interested in photography.(Often stands
outside a barn as you come out. Very quick, you can easily miss
her.) but I'm worried now as Mike hasn't come home yet and his
breakfast cornflakes are getting mushy. Micky, dear, sweet Micky,
is scaring my cat with a red balloon and seems oblivious to my
suffering.
Loyalty ! That's all i expect for my clone-money.Yeah, I got the
cuddles and kisses and everything but it's all falling apart now.
I even got Mike to dance with me ! Come back Mike.......hey...whatta
...YOU LOVE MIKE MORE THAN ME...Oh, here we go again. Micky, get
off the page, please....HEY...I DIDN'T GET ANY CORNFLAKES !...You
said you didn't want any. You said they were "...O - double GROSS,
Kellog's crap to you"...DID NOT !...Did too...DID NOT !...
Did..oh let it be.Anyway, I love you just as much as Mike, if not
more...YEAH RIGHT ! ALL HE HAS TO DO IS WINK, ONCE, AND YOU'RE
JELLO IN HIS HANDS AND I HAVE TO PULL FACES AND BAT MY EYELASHES
AND SING AND WORK WONDERS WITH MY SMILE...cut !
Well, I finally got Mick to calm down. Luckily my English friend
Samantha popped round and seems to be doing a great job in
comforting Micky...
Mike's still not back. I think I'll throw tha cornflakes away,
go to my room and then, possibly, cry a bit.
And after that I'll open a second box of my naked Mike.
One down, ninety-nine to go.
Did someone say vicious circle ?
LoydM